Approaching Attractive Women, Great Cocky & Funny Examples For All Situations (part 2)
This Article: It's how you say it, Don't buy her attention, Be interesting and unpredictable
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***QUESTION***
Dear Dave D,
My name is N, thank you for ur kind email. I have had, for the past six years problems talking to women. Often I approach one that takes my fancy in a bar and she just laughs in my face, perhaps it bis my mullet and novelty beard but i dont want to change my image as im happy with the way i look.
I also seem to find myself feeling sexually pent up and this makes me more desperate and hence starts a chain of cataclismic problems in which i just frighten off any women by suggesting she "come back to my place". I dont know how to leave this vicious circle of dating desperation i have found myself in. I was just wondering if you had any advice for such a lost cause.
yours faithfully
n (the potential loser)
David D:
Mullet and "novelty beard"? The "potential loser"? Yep, that's a real question, from a real person.
Sometimes I get emails from guys who say things like "Are all those stories and emails you print real? Or do you make them up?". Well, I'm here to tell ya... I don't make any of these stories and questions up... ever. Not even one.
I mean, could I MAKE UP stuff like this? lol...
***SUCCESS STORY***
I would just like to say that your techniques seem to be flawless. Maybe there's an exception or two out there, but I haven't seen it. I used to be the wuss of all wusses, but then I found your materials. Great stuff.
I learned it all, but it took me a while to actually employ your strategies because I was such a huge wuss before and lacked the confidence and security to really attempt it. Recently (within the past two months) I have taken that step to actually practice what you preach, and I've found it to be incredible.
All I needed was an attitude change. It was a lot like one of the emails you included in this past week's mailbag, about keeping that attitude of "next" with women. I just decided that I absolutely did not care at all how they reacted to anything I had to say. This simple change gave me the power to say whatever I wanted with women, and the whole cocky&funny routine just naturally followed suit. It's great.
Now I've got women who just can't seem to get enough of me. All you guys out there need to realize that David is right. He's said time and time again that it really doesn't matter what you say, but how you say it, along with all your body language, and when you realize that, you no longer worry about what you say to women and everything becomes more comfortable.
And when you're comfortable, cocky&funny is easy. So go out there and bag some ladies! That is, if I don't first.
-SMac
David D:
It doesn't matter what you say... it's HOW you say it... There, I said it again. Thanks for the email. I appreciate it.
***Comments***
you know im not dissin you, im sure you provide a good service, but i am a regular guy and i like to do for others, especially women i like, and im not gonna hide who i am , im a nice guy who does not play games, ill admit i get played, sometimes, but thats the price i have to pay for being such a great guy. good luck and i hope that not too many meaningless relationships come from your advice, leading to a higher divorce rate.
David D:
IMPORTANT: I've included the above letter because I want to use it to demonstrate the attitude of a guy who is naturally UNSUCCESSFUL with women. This particular guy actually thinks that his approach of "getting played a few times" because "that's' the price I have to pay for being such a nice guy" is not only the best thing for him, but also the best thing for everyone else.
Notice the "I hope not too many meaningless relationships come from your advice" comment. The subtle implication is that what I teach is bad for relationships... and that "doing for others" and "being a nice guy" are the ultimate sacrifice and demonstration of your superiority.
Well, I have some sobering news, Mr. Smarty...
Your self image of a "great guy" who "does for others... especially women you like" and who "sometimes gets paid" but "that's the price you have to pay for being such a great guy" is, in my opinion, WAY OFF BASE.
Let's talk, can we?
When a guy "does especially nice things for women he likes", he is attempting to MANIPULATE HER. Guess why you "get played"?
Right, because women can sense this manipulative behavior, and they take advantage of the perks without giving anything in return. The only way to "get played" is to walk into a relationship with a woman thinking that doing unhealthy, unbalanced things like taking her out, buying her things, and giving her gifts is the "such a nice guy" thing to do.
Well, it isn't. It's the SUCH A WUSSY thing to do. It's the "I don't think a woman would just like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to BUY her attention, approval, and affection with gifts and favors" thing to do.
And finally, your not-so-subtle suggestion that the things I teach guys contributes to "meaningless relationships" and "a higher divorce rate" did not go unnoticed. And guess what? It's misinformed.
The reality is that YOU are the one who is doing things that are leading to more "meaningless relationships" and "a higher divorce rate". Stop the insanity, man.
Women don't want Wussies! They don't want men who have to BUY their attention and approval. They don't want men who act like WOMEN. They want men who act like MEN.
Do yourself a huge favor. Think this one over carefully. I can tell that you're not TRYING to manipulate women and do things that lead to more "meaningless relationship" and contribute to "a higher divorce rate"... but you ARE. Don't you hate it when people twist your words around and use them against you?
Well, it's my job, so I have a good excuse.
***QUESTION***
Dear David,
You have been a god send the last few months since i discovered your mailing list. It's been a great daily reminder and motivator. But now i have a kinda odd question. You've always taught that attractive women are always approached and they all have seen and heard all the lines. yata yata.
BUT what if i'm not normal and i don't chase after hot model figures, but rather a down to earth, pretty cute and nice, not to wild, doesn't even go to bars much. Would your advice still apply.
This situation kinda reminds me of American Pie, where one of the characters, i forget his name, has to go after a not so hot, plain jane choir girl. I'm sure if she was real, she would not have been approached by as many guys as a hot girl would be approached by. Does the cocky/funny attitude come off as different for this type of girl, or just kinda rude and pushy.
Please include this in your newsletter as i'm sure there's a bunch of guys out there that don't always go after the head cheerleader type. Do it for all of us nerds.
PS, One of my favorite tips in your book was to watch James Bond movies and learn his posture and attitude, etc. Its killer, i swear its worked like gold for me. Lots of contact from females. woohoo
MO from KS
David D:
ANSWER: Yes, my advice will still apply. Now quit TALKING about it and THINKING about it and get out there and DO SOMETHING. Find out for yourself. The only one who can really validate this stuff for you is YOU. Go use the materials!
***QUESTION***
Hi David,
My name is Jason. I'm one of your recent customers. I am reading your book on being successful with women. There's a girl that I am really falling for. She's a real sweet/nice one. She's one in a million.
Now, I read your book but it only seems to be relevant if a guy wants to find a one night stand or a little fling. I don't mean to disrespect your writing. It's just that I'm looking for something other than that typical dating scene. I would just like to ask you to give me some tips on getting a nice, down to earth girl, and how to make it last. I know that you're a busy man but I would really appreciate this. I think she's the one.
Thank you very much.
-J
Please also recommend some books for me to....be really funny.
Thanks
David D:
Yea, DANGER WILL ROBINSON... DANGER! Look, you sound to me like you're about to make a HUGE mistake with this girl. My materials are NOT directed at guys who only want to get into "one night stands". My book is directed at guys who want to learn about how to make women feel ATTRACTION for them.
Now, if this girl is extra sweet, nice, etc. and she's quiet, shy, and introverted, you'll probably have to "turn things down" a bit. But my guess is that YOU are the "extra sweet and nice" one here... not her. You're probably projecting all kinds of imaginary ideas onto her, and you're probably acting like a six-week-old puppy who lost his mom when you're around her.
I'll tell you what...
See how well that strategy works for you, and when she says "I like you so much as a friend that I don't want to do anything to take a chance of messing that up" (Translation: "I'm not feeling any ATTRACTION for you"), refer back to my book. My book teaches you to be INTERESTING... to be UNPREDICTABLE... to be fun and challenging.
But it's your choice. You get to make all the calls in your life.
If I were in your situation, I'd be doing the things to make her feel ATTRACTION... not the things that make her feel the "what a sweet guy" feelings. Save all that for after you're in a relationship. But again, it's your choice. It's your life.
You have to do what you think is best, because you are the one who gets to live with the results.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Dearest Dave
Well, you've done it. Your number one on my best pal list. What can i say? About 3 months ago i purchased your E-books. About am on a saturday morning. I didn't have much planed for the day, so i read, and read, then read some more, i could feel the change whilst reading. (realization) I could feel sparks in my head.
Saturday night i was buzzing. I was new and improved and wanted to show it. I didn't over dress like i normally do for a night out. Just (ENGLAND) rugby shirt and jeans. I'm not sure what happened but 4 girls i had never met and did not know each other were hanging around me.
Basically i had told each one earlier whilst being cocky and funny that "I know you like me i can tell from your body language, But i don't think you could handle me, How ever that girl over there can (Just pointed to any other girl in vicinity)"
4 Girls were discretely trying to shove bits of paper with numbers, e-mail's, etc. in my jeans. 3 months now and i'm still in contact with 3 of them. But i may go for one in particular. Its amazing. This is me. I've finally escaped from mr nice guy. I still have loads to learn and this girl may not be the one but thanks for the boost.
M .
England
David D:
I love stories like this one. The reality is that we all have the potential to go out and make this happen... it just comes down to learning how to think, what to do, and how to do it. Your comment "This is me" was great. It's great to "escape from Mr. Nice Guy", isn't it? And it certainly doesn't hurt that women love it when you escape as well...
***QUESTION***
Hello Dave,
Who made you an expert with women? You must be a complete idiot to think that you have something as complicated as the mind of a modern woman figured out.
David D:
Yea, you're right. I suck. I have no idea what I'm doing. In fact, I'll tell you what I'm going to do...
I'm going to stop paying attention to the hundreds and thousands of emails I get with amazing success stories from all over the world... many of which you're reading in this newsletter. I'm going to just give up and stop even trying to figure women out. I'll tell you what... good luck with your future interactions with women. Sounds to me like you might need it. Hey, buy a lottery ticket while you're at it...
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If you're walking around right now and you have no idea HOW to get four dates in five nights, then that's only the tip of the iceberg. Get serious now. End disappointment. Start here.